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The Path of Eternal Boredom
Aka The Road to No-Where
By Dave Luxton (Originally published in Pseudo Dragon)

"..."
-some Ancient follower of the Road to No-Where

Nickname: Coffin-Potatoes.

Basic Beliefs: Although it is believed that this path was originated by ancient Methuselahs long ago, it has gained some popularity among the vampiric youth of the modern age. The followers of the Path believe that the Beast is a creature of action always wishing to be in motion, motivated by needs and emotions. By denying the Beast stimulus a vampire can reduce the Beast's control of him. Give the Beast no reason to frenzy and it will not do so. To avoid provoking the Beast they avoid actions, doing the minimum required to exist. In fact many of the more devout followers tend to subsist, and truly dedicated fall into voluntary torpor.

The Ethics of the path
*The beast is a thing of Action. Avoid Action when ever possible.
*Boredom is an ideal state. Learn to accept it.
*Caring about anything can lead to temptation.
*Unfortunately feeding is necessary unless in torpor. Reduce the effort required to feed
*Voluntary Torpor is the ultimate state

History
Believed to have been invented long ago, by a Methuselah who grew tired of living, no followers of this path have bothered to do any research to verify this.

Current Practices
Lying in their coffins all night is common for Coffin-Potatoes. This Path has no structure and holds no meetings.

Description of Followers
Vampires following this path are the most lazy and apathetic undead in existence. If they venture outside of their Havens it is when they are new to the Path. Many beginners on the Road to No-Where complain about having nothing to do, and they suffer continual boredom with their lot, despite this being their goal in their unlife. As they advance in their Path they spend more time in their coffins, or sitting around their havens. Modern vampires may make use of the TV as a way to pass the time.

Views About the Other Paths
* Path of Caine -- "They do too much"
* Path of Cathari -- "They enjoy themselves too much"
* Path of Death and the Soul -- "They study too much"
* Path of Evil Revelations -- "They are bad and do too much"
* Path of Harmony -- "They do too much"
* Path of Honorable Accord -- "They do too much"
* Path of Humanitas -- "They do too much"
* Path of Power and the Inner Voice -- "They control too much"

Following the Path
Ironically this Path is not always the easiest one to follow. Doing nothing does have it's problems. One concern is feeding themselves before the Beast forces them to. Some have dominated their servants to come to their masters coffin every night, cut their own wrists and drip their blood into their masters mouths. This practice requires a great deal of effort initially but subsequent effort for feeding is reduced to merely swallowing the vitae. Others have gone so far as to arrange for regular blood transfusions, there-by eliminating the need to swallow. The eventual pinnacle of success for a Coffin-Potato is to enter voluntary Torpor. Few, however, reach this exulted state. Many follow this Path for a time, before the boredom becomes too much and they give up this Path and choose another Road to follow. It is only the truly dedicated that master the Path of Eternal Boredom.

Path of Eternal Boredom Hierarchy of Sins
Path rating / Minimum wrongdoing for Path Roll
10 - Moving - not entering voluntary Torpor.
9 - Getting out of ones coffin during the night.
8 - Being Motivated by anything other than Survival.
7 - Trying to improve one-self.
6 - Not Procrastinating - performing any task immediately.
5 - Showing any enthusiasm whatsoever.
4 - Not over sleeping by at least 1 hour every evening.
3 - Being Hasty.
2 - Becoming overly enthusiastic about anything.
1 - Actively seeking interesting ways to pass time.